Forgive Me
by A Single Drop of Blood
Summary: My second songfiction. Set in Eclipse just after Bella tells Edward that she can't stand it if [he] leaves her again. Not sure if it should be K or T here... it's inbetween, I guess.


Author's Chapter Notes:

_**Alright, so here's how it is. When I posted my first song-fiction, people seemed to like that. So, decided to try for another one. In the end, I spent FOREVER looking for a different song that would be suitable. **_

_**Of course, it just HAD to be about Bella. I mean, Edward is amazing and perfect and fun to write about and all that, but it's just SO HARD to find songs that fit him well that haven't already been done. So Bella it was. **_

_**I spent about two weeks looking through my Evanescence albums; I just have to say that Amy Lee is the perfect Twilight fan/song-fiction inspiration, you know?**_

_**But anyways, I finally came across this. Forgive Me, by the amazing Amy Lee herself. I listened to this song, and decided that I wanted to do something with it. Then, I spent about three days of playing this song on repeat on my iPod before it came to me.**_

_**This song-fiction is about Bella's emotional roller coaster in Eclipse after she pulled the "I can't stand it if you leave me again," when she was trying to keep Edward from fighting with the others. Hopefully, I don't let you down (because it would just be mortifying if I spent all this time on the world's longest Author's Note just so I could give you a crappy song), but, of course, your reviews at the end of this will tell me what you think. And ALL of you will be reviewing of course. **_

_**Why, you ask? **_

_**Because I have ice cream and cookies. **_

_**Duh!**_

_Can you forgive me again?_

_I don't know what I said,_

_But I didn't mean to hurt you._

I saw the pain contort his face, quickly becoming the dominant emotion on his ethereal face. Instantly, the guilt consumed me, took me over and pulled me into the darkness with its horrible, icy grasp.

_I heard the words come out._

_I thought that I would die._

_It hurt so much to hurt you._

_Then you looked at me._

_You're not shouting anymore._

_You're silently broken._

His arms wrapped around me, comforting _me_. Me of all people, the very person who had just caused him all this pain. The guilt monster also wrapped around me, squeezing me so hard I thought my lungs had collapsed. I was a monster for doing this to him. I wanted to take the words back so bad, and yet knew that, if this worked, I wouldn't regret it **as** badly.

_I'd give anything now._

_To cure those words for you._

_Each time I say something I regret,_

_I cry – I don't want to lose you._

_But somehow I know that you will never_

_Leave me (Yeah)_

I feel so horrible inside. I was such a horrible, unbelievably evil person for purposely hurting the one I loved, even if it was to protect him from getting hurt. I mentally laughed, a slow, harsh laugh. I'm hurting him to keep from him getting hurt. Oh yes, Bella, you are a genius . . .

He hasn't broken the silence yet. I'm still waiting, waiting for the answer, which I so badly desire, but hate because I know I forced him to say it. But I just can't lose him…

_'Cause you were made for me._

_Somehow I'll make you see_

_How happy you make me (Whoah)._

_I can't live this life_

_Without you by my side._

_I need you to survive._

_So stay with me._

_You look in my eyes_

_And I'm screaming inside_

_That I'm so sorry!_

God. He's going to stay. Now the guilt is intermingling with the relief. I got what I wanted. I should be so happy, so grateful, so relieved. So why was the guilt not vanquished?

I knew why.

I had hurt Edward so badly because of my pure selfishness. But, as horrible of a statement as it was…

It was true.

I could not stand losing him, him leaving, having to sit and worry and worry and worry. I just couldn't. So…

I wasn't sure if I could forgive myself. Could **he** ever forgive me?

_Will you forgive me again?_

_You're my one true friend,_

_And I never meant to hurt you._

Chapter End Notes:

_**: Alright. Hope that you're satisfied with that. It's based off of an actual part of the book this time, which makes it harder than a made-up scene. But, I THINK I did alright with this one. I mean, I read it over, had my friend read it over, and we agree that it's a decent song-fiction. But now, it's up to you. YOU have to tell me how it is. Amazing? Horrible? Literature? Crap?**_

_**Just press that little button down there and type in a review, and let me know.**_


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